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The Racist’s Guide To The People Of South Africa
Posted by on Apr 13th, 2012

Ever wondered why Indian guys always play sport in jeans or what a stressed black person looks like?

Well I was in Exclusive Books yesterday buying my mom a birthday present and stumbled across this book on the shelf and i thought i’d share some of it’s politically incorrect, comprehensively unscientific humour which claims to answer questions like the ones above. It was published in 2010, but it’s the first time i saw it so i briefly  paged through it.

Here’s some quotes from the book.

On English speaking white people: “Whites love rules and laws – but only if they get to make them … That’s why they hate car guards so much – because they’re always telling you what to do.”

On coloureds : “Besides disciplining their kids in public, the top five things that turn other people red with shame but don’t bother Coloureds at all, are: smiling without any front teeth, loitering, punching, kicking and slapping each other, making a scene in public and swearing at each other …”

On Indian people: “If you see a group of more than fifty Indian’s don’t assume this is a political or religious gathering. Chances are it’s a family outing…since Indians have large families and love to go out as a group. The main purpose of these picnics appear to be for men to play cricket and women to cook curry together. Despite close proximity to water, the purpose of these outings is not to swim – so swimming costume is seldom taken along with. In fact Indian people are scared of being exposed to too much sunlight because they rather not become any more tanned than they already are. This is called Snow White  complex and its the reason you will always see Indians playing outside with his jeans on – and if he gets hot – jump into water still in his jeans. Whites don’t understand this behaviour.”

That was some of the milder stuff…the author doesn’t hold back.

It’s obviously gonna offend many folks, but hey it’s sometimes healthy to laugh at ourselves once in a while.

You can get the book online from Kalahari HERE.

Chopper Charlie says:
April 04, 2012 at 10:23 am

Fuckin’ great read. Loved it.

Lili says:
April 04, 2012 at 10:23 am

I’m usually a stick-in-the-mud when it comes to books like these, but I have to admit I thought this was very funny. The style is pretend-naive and the humour is gentle. He makes fun of ALL races and it made me giggle quite a bit.

clint says:
April 04, 2012 at 10:23 am

I don’t read much, but would love to get my hands on this, book the incerpt above has me excited to read even further

Abby says:
April 04, 2012 at 10:23 am

Also read through while browsing in Exclusive Books, was really funny and accurate!

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